Tcharnghir
(Foretelling)
“No!”
I came awake sputtering and struggling to inhale. I didn’t know if I had
screamed or if the word was on my lips only in the dream. I didn’t hear any telltale
movement within the house so I had to have only dreamed screaming out. The
prayer of the young Marine from my dream echoed through my sleep-addled
thoughts.
“Deliver me unto the hands of
God, so that I may be shepherded across the swift waters. I accept this embrace
into my Creator’s flock and I shall reside within the fields of Heaven. There,
will I find refuge from the grips of evil.
“I have lived my life upon the
good and moral path. I have resisted the temptations of the Lords of Darkness. I
have fought their grip upon our souls.
“Lord, I come to you in the
execution of my duty to you. I beseech thee: deliver me not into the darkness
of Hell.”
The last time I had heard the Lord’s
Prayer for the Dying uttered was from my mother at Luke Elise’s memorial
service.
My sheets were soaked and clammy. They were twisted about my body and my
heart was beating too fast as I tried to breathe deeply to calm down. My room
was oddly surreal in the waning darkness, its interior visible only as
silhouettes created by the dawn light coming through the window.
I wasn’t sure if it was one of those dreams that came when change was imminent
in my life. More than likely it was a pure and simple nightmare brought on by
too many long hours at work, with too much coffee, and not enough food or
decent sleep.
I untangled myself from my sheets and went over to my room’s single
window. I opened it to let the early autumn air in. It gave me gooseflesh but
helped to calm me. I breathed it in deeply, feeling my heart slow a little more
with each breath. My body still buzzed with adrenaline and my hands shook as I
leaned on them against the sill.
The images slowly faded from my
fatigued mind like the diminishing echo of some sudden, discordant noise. They
were not as strong but still hung in my thoughts and reverberated. I still felt
a little of the noise as a buzz in my bones, chilling me as certain as the air
coming through my bedroom window.
She had had no recollection of
the crash after her landing craft had been shot down. She tried to move and pain
interlaced every inch of her body. Her armor injected more drugs and she was
swept with a mild euphoria that dulled the pain in her consciousness. She
struggled to move again. The armor’s Kinetic Enhancement should have been able
to propel her even if her body couldn’t. She could barely crawl. Her link with
the armor confirmed that the KEMAS was damaged. Through her interlinking the
acknowledgement came as another disparate sort of pain that would not dull
against the onslaught of drugs. If she had not had that superhuman link with her
armor, the shock of her injuries would have killed her outright. She felt out
the energy levels in her armor’s power packs. She would have plenty, though it
would draw a lot of power to force the nearly seized KEMAS into motion. She had
no choice. Directing more energy into the damaged lines, she began to slowly crawl
in the direction the GPS had told her lay help. She hoped her armor held enough
drugs to keep her capable of moving along with the suit.
The enhanced audio sensors of
her armor warned her of the approaching soldiers. She heard the faint crunching
of boot on rock as though right on top of her. Painfully, she looked over her
shoulder. Her stomach was hollow and her heart beat faster as she recognized
the bulky armor of her enemy.
She tried to free her EMPAW
from its harness but realized that the weapon was smashed and useless. The clip
of small missiles normally locked around the weapon’s fore grip had also
detached. She started to breathe hard. She focused upon the status of the
Anti-Personnel Laser on her left gauntlet: it was okay.
She tried to power down and
adjust the chromatoskin of her armor to match the bare, gray ground around her.
It was non-responsive. She brought her power back up when the first soldier
found her. She sensed eyes on her back as he brought his weapon to bear. She
knew she was as good as dead. Reiterating the long-forgotten Lord’s
Prayer of her childhood, she readied
herself, pushing her fear as far away as possible, to roll and fire.
The soldier paused, so she
tried to gather a little more strength. More steps approached and she knew the platoon’s
officer was on the scene. Linked as they were, she could incapacitate all of
them if she killed him.
Kicking as best she could at
the bare ground, she acted as though she were scurrying away in desperation. She
rolled and fired the APL, aiming for the joint of his gorget and helmet. Her
targeting was off and the blast grazed the mirror plating on his helmet. The
attempt to roll brought excruciating pain that made her consciousness waiver
and her armor became a heavy shell around her body, barely moving with her
efforts.
Shaking my head to disperse the feelings and images, I looked out over
the checkerboard landscape of Duiledaire’s backyards. The sun was just barely
coming up, giving a long twilight to the land. It was comforting but I still
couldn’t shake the feeling of hopelessness that remained with me from the dream.
Tears flooded her cheeks and
pooled in her helmet. Her breath was short and hard. She tried to breathe slow
and deep but could only gasp. There was a feeling of a presence within her. It
was not the Creator. She had been abandoned as surely as she had formerly abandoned
her faith. She struggled to maintain her focus. Her mind wanted to wander. She
was so sore; so sleepy.
One thought raced through her addled mind.
She thought of her brother on Wassenglia. He was the only person she had grown
up with and truly still called family. He would soon be graduating from the
Academy. He would soon be here facing them.
She screamed within her helmet. “No!”
My whole body shuddered. Was it purely from that dream; of experiencing
the life of someone resigned to die? Or
was it me? I thought about the
possibilities as I sat by the open window.
There certainly was a sense of hopelessness to me. I had completed weeks
of grueling, mindless work renovating the antiquated modules at the recycling
plant. It was definitely not a job where I felt ambitious goals for promotion.
It merely paid my student loans and gave me drinking money. And I couldn’t
stand it any more. I couldn’t stand the listless existence of getting up every
morning and just being. I was standing still in my life.
I looked out at the rising sun. It formed a beautiful, translucently
violet horizon where the curve of Andowhan ended and space began. I wondered if
there might be something better beyond that horizon. There must be some real
meaning, out there, but I felt isolated and constrained from it.
Leaving the window open, I crawled back into bed and stared up at the
ceiling of the room I used to share with Zeke. I liked the coolness of autumn.
There was always an anxious expectation in the air as the equinox approached.
Most people within my culture looked to the winter solstice as an annual
turning point within their lives; that chance to start anew. For me, it was
always the autumnal equinox as the world readied to sleep and rejuvenate
itself.
The last memories of the
nightmare—the tromly, in the
household tongue of my people—faded. My breathing slowed and grew deep, rocking
me as a boat in waves. Each dip into the trough of my exhale brought me a
little closer to sleep as I thought not of the dream, but the horizon where my
planet ended and space began.
Like what you've read so far? Find it at Amazon:
All content contained herein is copyrighted and the sole intellectual property of Pat Morrissey and may not be reproduced elsewhere without proper attribution.
No comments:
Post a Comment